I am Leaving

Monday: April 7th, 2008

I had no idea the human heart could break like this. I watched mine do that very thing today. It shattered into tiny little pieces, and, I am still picking them up. Among the shards, I am finding pieces of his. They look the same, almost; his are a little redder than mine. I wanted so badly to keep it together, to stay with him, but, in order for him to become more than what he is, I had to leave him. Being a pillar for someone, it is hard. It hurts. In the end, you crumble.

God, it hurts so fucking much.

I did the hardest thing that anyone could do in his or her lives.

I don’t know if I can survive it…

In the end, I know things will get better. The sun will shine again. Everything will be warm once more, but, for now, the clouds and pale winter fields will suite me just fine.